A New Year

We are back home after a visit in Illinois. It was an interesting week with many ups and downs. Most of the week was spent going through the "stuff" at my mom's house. It seems strange to me that I actually spent so many years living in that house. Somehow it was hard to remember that being home. My old room is now the storage room and is filled with our stuff and my brother's stuff because we have too much stuff and not enough room. It doesn't seem like anyone's home so much anymore - just a place to sort through years of someone's life, sorting it into logical places where we can all decide if there is anything worth selling, keeping or just throwing it away. It all seemed quite clinical at times and it was just plain hard. I was so thankful that Dan was there and did so much work and gave me time to look at the little things I would find. It helped to see what was there one last time.

It's funny how you come across things and wonder why someone saved it. I wondered why something was important and just smiled at some things. I learned that although my mom never showed a lot of outward emotion - I think she was pretty sentimental at heart. She always teased my dad that he spent more on the big heart box than on the Valentine candy. But...in the back of her closet, were the heart boxes. I couldn't bear to throw them away anymore than she could. In her kitchen cupboards were many thank you notes she had received from her grandchildren. And yes, I can picture my mom on those quiet nights alone in the big house, getting them out and reading through them. Those were her little treasures.

Looking back over mom's life, there weren't any huge accomplishments by the standards of today's society. However, I would say she died with few regrets. There were things about her that drove me crazy - but I can only imagine how many things about me drive others crazy. I miss her letters. I hated seeing her spot in church empty. But, hopefully I can learn to be a litte more tolerant, see the good in people, enjoy the simple things in life and like her, realize that when you leave this earth - nothing goes with you but people will definitely remember what you left behind. Thanks mom - you did good.

It is hard to believe that another year has ended. Here it is 2007 - it seems like just yesterday that so much was being made over the computer crash that was sure to come at the end of 1999. I am not an overly goal-oriented person - not one to make lists or resolutions, so I don't have any great, specific declarations to make for this year. However, I hope overall to be the following: more like Christ; more loving to my husband whom I adore and to my children who are treasures; a better friend; more positive; more active in the world around me.

So, with that, the year begins...